Want to see "Oppai Bare (Boobs Volleyball)" but are too embarrassed to ask for a ticket?

by Chris MaGee

We've been following Eiichiro Hasumi's upcoming sports comedy "Oppai Bare (Boobs Volleyball)" since it was announced last July. Starring Haruka Ayase as a high school teacher named Mikako makes a very unusual agreement with her high school volleyball team: if they can whip themselves into shape then she'll make their pubescent dreams come true and let them see her breasts. I think I would have got off my ass and gotten involved in sports in high school if they had that kind of arrangement!

I was a bit surprised when I found out that "Oppai Bare's" teen sex comedy plot line was actually based on a successful novel by Japanese author Mizuno Munenori, but I was really surprised when none of the promo images or trailers for the film featured Ayase in anything low-cut, clingy or in any way provocative. It seems like the film's tag line, "Win this game, and teacher will flash her boobs!", and title might be the only somewhat naughty things in the whole production.

Now, on the eve of the film's April 18th Japanese theatrical run, it seems like even the title may be causing a few ripples of controversy. According to an article posted at Cinema Today some theatre owners are a tad embarrassed by the use of the word oppai "boobs" in the title and some moviegoers feel a bit embarrassed about marching up to the box office and asking to see "that boobs movie". So, to ease everyone's breast paranoia Japanese theatres will not only have "Oppai Bare" advertised as "O.P.V." on their marquees, but will also have tickets printed out with the same acronym.

Let me just go on record here by saying... THEY'RE ONLY BOOBS, PEOPLE! They don't bite and 50% of the population has them. In fact if "Oppai Bare" comes out and there isn't even a millisecond glimpse of Haruka Ayase's breasts onscreen I'd take my "O.P.V." ticket back for a refund. Put "boobs" in the title and you'd best deliver!